We got married!! Finally!!
It was a long 2 years. Well, in hind site it wasn’t. It actually went by super fast. In that time we loved, we hurt, we succeeded, we failed. We did a lot of living and a lot of life, but still… super fast. I went through my RCIA, the annulment process, the marriage preparation, so much preparation. I got a glimpse in the middle of our marriage counseling part. I got a glimpse that my marriage was going to be so much different than my engagement but I had no idea how much more deep it would be and feel.
He showed me somewhere in there that to him there was something deeper coming. I want to keep saying THEY but THEY is ME now. I was confirmed at my wedding ceremony and had my first Communion!! It was amazing…
Marriage for Catholics is life changing. There’s Sacramental Grace provided so we get this extra burst of turbo gas to be who we are meant to be in this marriage. I got a little extra grace for all of the 4 Sacraments I experienced that day. Those help. A lot!
Marriage for Catholics is permanent. There’s no exit here. There’s no divorce, no leaving, no “it didn’t work out” or “things changed” or “I fell out of love”. Even cheaters don’t get a free exit nor the poor spouse who was cheated on. Those excuses don’t matter. Those are reasons why you now live with a stranger” for Catholics. It’s a reason to try harder. If you piddle in your pond you have to sit in it. So I see that there’s more genuine trying. More actual heart revealed and honest love. More grace more fairness, more love. It’s strange. I feel like I have given 100% since I met him, but then I see he was almost holding back. Almost protecting himself from the possibility that I could leave him. Now that we are married it’s like the commitment is confirmed and it’s now safe to love. It feels so so good.
We work harder to love each other now. When you know it’s forever, you want that forever to be good. There’s a knowledge that to love means to sacrifice and so we do. When we sacrifice for one another, we win. Now there is, how shall I say?? Bathtub moments… where the love is all around you and you just take a moment to bathe in it 🙂 That’s allowed, but then you go on and love them back and make whatever sacrifices necessary to bathe them in your love so they can enjoy that special feeling of being the one and only for you. It’s fun. It’s important. It is very very good.
So there we are – married. Loving life, little bumps here and there. I’m humbled a little everyday – I’m amazed a little everyday. I’m just… happy.